Melisa Uchida

Which is more important to you: Piece of mind or Peace of Mind?

I recently made a commitment to be my best self all of the time. I realize it’s a big goal that requires continuous awareness and reflection. I had to consciously prioritize my peace of mind above all else. (FYI- I fail at it daily and reflect each night on how to do it differently moving forward).

This is new for me. I have a well-established habit of complaining about things, events, people and situations that I don’t like at that particular moment. (“At that moment” is important because what we like and dislike changes, like everything else on Earth.)

I was texting one of my best friends a list of complaints for that week. I stopped after three and looked at the list. Were any of these worth giving up my PEACE OF MIND? What I wanted to do was vent. But in doing that, I was giving away a piece or sliver of my peace of mind.

If we look at PEACE OF MIND as a pie; Visualize your brain and the energy around it as a whole pie. When we complain, judge, get angry, hold onto resentments, ruminate, criticize ourselves or others – we are taking out a slice of that pie. It doesn’t matter if we are hurling it at the object of our dissatisfaction or more often – someone else, eating it, sharing it with someone, or throwing it in the trash – the effect is the same. We have lost our PEACE OF MIND for the sake of wanting someone to have a PIECE OF OUR MIND.

Here’s the thing, we can’t have both at the same time. It’s one or the other.

Try this with me, just for fun.

On a scale of 1-10, how important is your feeling good to you? In other words, how important is your PEACE OF MIND to you right now?

1 = not important at all

10 = extremely important

Most of us fall somewhere in the middle. We have not made our own peace of mind, our joy or our feeling good, a priority.

What if you bumped your number up to 10? What would that look like?

Now, think of a something that bothers you, a complaint or criticism old or new. Is this worth giving up your feeling good? Is this something you want to carry with you into the future? Is this worth losing your peace of mind? Try to see it from outside the normal habitual thinking of the brain. How important is feeling good to you?

Life will bring about many opportunities to play with this, test it and so have fun with it. Anytime something comes up and ruffles your feathers, gets you activated in a negative way – ask yourself – “Is this worth my PEACE OF MIND?

Know that you have a choice. The conditioned patterns are strong, I realize it often feels like we don’t have a choice. But there is a choice there, buried in the muck of habituation.

Choice A) give a piece of your mind to: anger, resentment, judgment, contempt, complaining, other people, systems that don’t work etc. You get the idea. The list of things that affect our peace of mind is never-ending. There are plenty of people who don’t behave, believe, or see things the way you do. You can give away pieces of your peace to all of them.

OR Option B: choose holding onto your PEACE OF MIND by making it your number one priority.

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