Messages from Spirit
I started receiving messages from Spirit one month before my husband died. It was the Saturday night before Mothers’ Day 2021. I was on my bed, frozen. Nate was having a psychotic episode. Nate’s body was there, but the man I had married, the person who I felt safe with, loved and appreciated, was not. The “Nate that Hates Nate” had taken over his body. I was scared. My body, alert; every sense heightened. My knees were tucked into my chest to make myself as small as possible. I wanted to be invisible, My purse was on the floor next to my side of the bed. I had started carrying my purse around the house with me so I could get out quickly if needed – and so he wouldn’t look though it. My purse was open. A white envelope with my name on it lay on top. A yoga student had given me the card after class the previous Monday, but I hadn’t opened it. I’d forgotten about it, until that moment. I glanced at Nate. He was sitting on the other side of the living room breaking apart a clothes hamper and hurling pieces of plastic at an invisible target. He knew I was there, but for a moment, his focus was on his target and not on me. I reached down, picked up the envelope and quietly opened it. On the front of the card were images of, what I now know to be my angels and guides. There was a woman holding a crystal ball. Inside the ball was a man’s face. There was a pirate, a honey bee, women dancing and angels. Inside, my student had written a note, thanking me for taking the time to listen to her after class a few weeks earlier about a difficulty she was experiencing. She wrote how much it meant to her and that I had made a difference in her life. A feeling came over me that I can only describe as a “feeling of knowing.” At that moment, I knew I would make it through the night. I now know this type of communication is called clairecognisant, stemming from the two French words meaning, “clear” and “knowing.” I also received another message in words but not quite words and not with my ears. I heard, “Hang in there and stay alert until sunrise. He will back to himself once the sun comes up.” Sure enough, as the sun rose, I was exhausted and so was he, but my Nate was back, and “The-Nate-that-Hates-Nate” was gone. I taped the card on the mirror in my closet so that I would see it every day.
Two weeks later, I was in Joshua Tree for a girls’ weekend with high school friends. I sat on a huge boulder at a sacred place called “Spirit Rock” to meditate. Within minutes, I heard my paternal grandpa’s voice say, “Lighten up. You take things too seriously! Ease up.” Grandpa Uchidda had been dead for a few years by that point. His voice was clear. His usual tone of disapproval came through, along with the softness he occasionally let others see. I felt his love for me. I now know this to be claireaudience or clear-hearing. This was the first time I’d “heard” a voice from someone on the other side.
The next night, we were at our Air B&B in Joshua Tree. I sat alone on a chair to meditate in the desert. I heard the buzzing of the bees as they pollinated the flowers of the cacti. The vibrations were loud. I saw hummingbirds taking nectar from the same flowers. I was amazed there were bees and hummingbirds in the desert. My senses were alert, receiving the vibrations of the planet and life around me. When I honed in on the bees, I felt their vibration in my cells. When I focused on the hummingbird, I felt its vibration. When I looked at my feet, I saw feet and sand. When I looked at the horizon, I saw the vastness of the desert. I heard a voice coming from the trees. “Whatever you focus on is what you will see. Whatever you focus on is what you experience. Whatever you focus on will be your reality. You choose your point of focus every moment of every day. Choose wisely.” I had been living in a heightened state of fear for a well over a year as Nate’s mental illness progressed. Actually, I had been living in fight, flight or freeze for most of my life. I choose what I see? I choose what I experience? I choose what I focus on? This was a profound teaching for me. I’d lived my life feeling like things, people and events demanded, forced and grabbed my attention. At that point, a big part of me still believed that life happened to me. I’d felt powerless over many of the experiences in my life. To know that I have the power to choose what to focus on felt liberating. When I got home, I felt stronger and more clear than I had in years.
In the two weeks that followed, my Grandma Uchida and her sister Miyoko would visit me in my closet, where I’d taped the card my student had given me. They laughed and giggled and sounded like two young school girls peeping on something they weren’t supposed to, but in a fun, encouraging way. I felt their love, their pride, and it’s almost as if, they were playing with me. They wanted me to play, smile and laugh.
In the months following Nate’s transition, I saw intuitive healers, psychics and mediums for my own healing and to communicate with Nate. I didn’t hear my grandparents, guides or angels for a several months. But then something magical started to happen. Signs and synchronicities started to appear, one after another after another. Feathers on my doorstep, the cardinal that sang each morning from the tree outside Keanu’s room, the robin that would hop over to me and Keanu and seemed to be having a conversation with us, streaks of dancing light in the air, orbs, lights flickering, Keanu’s “baby shark” bath toy started singing and moving after months being quiet, Kaia’s name written on the kitchen window between the panes of glass, basement lights would turn ON when the light switch on the wall was OFF and so much more. As the signs grew, so did my asking Nate for more signs. Whatever I asked for – appeared. I joined a small weekly psychic development circle with a group of amazing women, and my abilities grew quickly. The guidance, consistency and support of that group was instrumental in my development. I started studying mediumship , Automatic Writing, ESP and more. I become obsessed with communicating with spirit. I learned that when my vibration is low (ie: bad mood, negative thinking, angry) – I am not tuned to the right frequency to communicate with Nate and my guides. Connecting with spirit is like tuning into a radio station. Dial to. 98.7 and you will hear what’s playing on that station. Tune to 106.5 to hear what’s playing there. I became obsessed with raising my vibration and tuning into the vibration of spirit. I committed to living in a state of higher vibration. The more I learn, study, practice, the more my abilities grow. I am dedicated to learning and teaching healing practices for the body, mind and spirit with fellow humans. I am not a professional psychic or medium. I am simply sharing my experiences and my journey of tuning into the psychic abilities all humans have, but have buried and forgotten. I am a student of life and am committed to learning as much as I can about life on planet Earth, on being human and on finding healing for the body, mind and spirit. www.yogipunk.com